The other day I went to the gym, and I was feeling pretty brave with my badass, so after my warm-up of 20 minutes on the elliptical, I head on down over to the big boy’s and girl’s area. This is the area I want to be in. This Big Girl area is what I think of as the area where fitness dreams are made. Plus I want to look as badass as those women do that I see working out on the Big Girl machines.
I want to go over there. I want to be that badass confident woman who’s not intimidated by this area. I want to give it a try because you know what?
I’m still young, and beautiful, and I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let fear keep me from my Divine ass 5D body, and life altering great health.
Well, I go over there. I start off on what I call the squat machine. I look at the bare bar and I think “I’m not gonna look like a wuss, so I put 10 lb weights on each side. I get positioned, grab the bar, and down I go into a squat.
It felt like I was carrying a a full grown man up a flight of stairs. I don’t remember this machine being this tough when I worked out in my 20’s. I get my 10 reps in so I don’t look like a weak bitch, and then I replace the 10l lb. weights with 5 lb. weights. I get positioned again and I go down into my squat.
This shit isn’t any better. It’s still heavy. I keep working out though because 10 lbs. isn’t going to kick my ass right?!?
I even threw in two sets of lunges, because I really wanted to get in a good workout.
Later that night I told my husband this story, and he came back with, Baby you forgot to add in the weight of the bar, and that’s usually 45 lbs.”,
Boy did I feel like a hot mess and a half rookie. I forgot to add in the weight of the bar. Now I’m paying for it. I had to miss a day from the gym to recoup because my legs stopped functioning. I could barely walk the next day.
I’m out of shape, and I know I’m out of shape, but I need to give myself some credit, and that is I’m showing up. No matter what, I’m gonna show up.
The Big Girl area is scary but I’m saying “Fuck the Fear”, like Seana Ann over at The Bohemian Blonde says, and I”m going for it. Next Tuesday I have a friend, who just happens to be a fitness model, come show me some exercises to do to get me more acquainted with this area.
Baby Steps. I will baby step this all the way if I have too, but I will keep going.